"My generation of boys is f**ked," says Rupert, a young German video game enthusiast I've been getting to know over the past few months. "Marriage is dead. Divorce means you're screwed for life. Women have given up on monogamy, which makes them uninteresting to us for any serious relationship or raising a family. That's just the way it is. Even if we take the risk, chances are the kids won't be ours. In France, we even have to pay for the kids a wife has through adulterous affairs.Asking "What's wrong with young men?" has become a cottage industry since the recession began in 2008. Amusingly, many of the stories are framed as, "Get over it, men! Those young ladies need husbands!"
"In school, boys are screwed over time and again. Schools are engineered for women. In the US, they force-feed boys Ritalin like Skittles to shut them up. And while girls are favoured to fulfil quotas, men are slipping into distant second place.
"Nobody in my generation believes they're going to get a meaningful retirement. We have a third or a quarter of the wealth previous generations had, and everyone's fleeing to higher education to stave off unemployment and poverty because there are no jobs.
"All that wouldn't be so bad if we could at least dull the pain with girls. But we're treated like paedophiles and potential rapists just for showing interest. My generation are the beautiful ones," he sighs, referring to a 1960s experiment on mice that supposedly predicted a grim future for the human race.
After overpopulation ran out of control, the female mice in John Calhoun's "mouse universe" experiment stopped breeding, and the male mice withdrew from the company of others entirely, eating, sleeping, feeding and grooming themselves but doing little else. They had shiny coats, but empty lives.
"The parallels are astounding," says Rupert.
Social commentators, journalists, academics, scientists and young men themselves have all spotted the trend: among men of about 15 to 30 years old, ever-increasing numbers are checking out of society altogether, giving up on women, sex and relationships and retreating into pornography, sexual fetishes, chemical addictions, video games and, in some cases, boorish lad culture, all of which insulate them from a hostile, debilitating social environment created, some argue, by the modern feminist movement.I like to think I've contributed in some small way to correcting one of these problems. I've told the girls at LifeTeen that whether they decide to marry or enter religious life, they're going to be asked out by many guys in the mean time. If they're just not feeling it, then kindly reject him. Don't get onto social media and be all, "OMG a total creeper harassed me today!!!"
You can hardly blame them. Cruelly derided as man-children and crybabies for objecting to absurdly unfair conditions in college, bars, clubs and beyond, men are damned if they do and damned if they don't: ridiculed as basement-dwellers for avoiding aggressive, demanding women with unrealistic expectations, or called rapists and misogynists merely for expressing sexual interest.
Meanwhile, boys are falling behind girls academically, perhaps because relentless and well-funded focus has been placed on girls' achievement in the past few decades and little to none on the boys who are now achieving lower grades, fewer honors, fewer degrees and less marketable information economy skills. Boys' literacy, in particular, is in crisis throughout the West. We've been obsessing so much over girls, we haven't noticed that boys have slipped into serious academic trouble.I was fortunate that my high school offered a mix of traditional literature in English along with the nascent multiculti propaganda. College, in contrast, was much worse. You could practically see the guys deciding that reading was for chicks and fags. Granted, I have a financial interest in urging more people to read, but it's sad to think the classics of the Western Canon are going untouched because of bad experiences in high school or college. Heinlein probably doesn't qualify as great literature, but I guaran-damn-tee boys would much prefer to read him as opposed to Barbara Kingsolver or Maya Angelou.
Men say the gap between what women say and what they do has never been wider. Men are constantly told they should be delicate, sensitive fellow travellers on the feminist path. But the same women who say they want a nice, unthreatening boyfriend go home and swoon over simple-minded, giant-chested, testosterone-saturated hunks in Game of Thrones. Men know this, and, for some, this giant inconsistency makes the whole game look too much like hard work. Why bother trying to work out what a woman wants, when you can play sports, masturbate or just play video games from the comfort of your bedroom?This one is easier to solve: pay attention to what women do, not what they say. Whenever a woman states an opinion, mentally tack on, "...right now," to the end of her sentences, i.e. "I believe divorce is a bad thing... right now."
Jack Donovan, a writer based in Portland who has written several books on men and masculinity, each of which has become a cult hit, says the phenomenon is already endemic among the adult population. "I do see a lot of young men who would otherwise be dating and marrying giving up on women," he explains, "Or giving up on the idea of having a wife and family. This includes both the kind of men who would traditionally be a little awkward with women, and the kind of men who aren't awkward with women at all.Extramarital sex is not an option for serious Catholics. Otherwise, I really can't conceive why Godless heathens bother with marriage at all anymore. Civil marriage isn't even a contract when one party can unilaterally dissolve it on a whim. Divorce will financially destroy a man for the rest of his life in most cases. The mother will almost always get the children unless she explicitly says she doesn't want them. I agree it's tragic that so many young men believe being players or permanent boyfriends are their only options. I laugh (because otherwise I'd cry) when the usual suspects say that men need to man up. If you're serious about encouraging young men to get good jobs, marry, and have children, then we need to completely reform our socio-economic paradigm. Because where feminists and white knights see a bunch of immature boys, I see men responding rationally to the incentives of the modern world.
"They've done a cost-benefit analysis and realised it is a bad deal. They know that if they invest in a marriage and children, a woman can take all of that away from them on a whim. So they use apps like Tinder and OK Cupid to find women to have protected sex with and resign themselves to being 'players,' or when they get tired of that, 'boyfriends.'"