Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Sometimes you have to lose to win

Donal Graeme ponders whether the battle of the sexes will end in a truce or victory:
Stingray didn’t miss anything. Traditional marriage (not the modern day “traditional marriage” variety either) was a compromise, a truce of sorts. The thing is, neither side wants a compromise. Men and women want a system which supports their preferred sexual strategy. Equilibrium, at least, a static form of it, is not something that can last. In fact, it was TSK who pointed out that the destruction of Traditional Marrage “was a joint effort, because they both thought that they could get an advantage.” Both men and women will always want to push the boundaries.
Something more likely than a truce is a withdrawal or retreat of sorts. What I mean is that members of one “side” decide to stop fighting and just remove themselves from the conflict as much as they can. The MGTOW movement is an example of this in action. Rather than compete, they merely try and survive. Of course, they cannot fully escape, thanks to taxes and such. But in so far as they can, they try to not get involved in the conflict. This is something I think will become more prominent in the future, at least among men. It is also possible we might see women start to do this as well- they are likely to be affected by a drop in male desirability just as men have been affected by a drop in female desirability.
The last forty years, at least, have demonstrated the results of a complete victory for women. They are free to indulge their instincts toward serial monogamy. It wasn't that long ago that there was no daylight between the time a woman lived with her father and lived with her husband. Now it's women who delay marriage to go to college, ride the carousel, and focus on their careers. If a woman is unmarried over the age of 25, it is always her choice. Christian women seldom differ from their secular sisters in this regard. I imagine a lot of well meaning Christian parents would be horrified if their 17 or 18 year old daughter announced that she was marrying her beloved post-haste. They'd gently try to talk her down, saying she's not mature enough, she should go to college first, maybe travel the world or start her career before settling down.

The secular red pill community generally encourages men to enjoy the decline and get the most benefit they can from the SMP wasteland. Not all men have the talent or the will-power to build themselves up into alphas. Godless heathens don't have many incentives to pursue traditional marriage. If they want sex, there are hookups or pornography. Many women in their cohort don't consider a man's provider status until they're about to hit the wall, so those men don't bother building up their provider status in the first place. Some call this a refusal to grow up; I call it a rational response to the incentives of Marriage 2.0.

Extramarital sex isn't an option for the serious Christian. Men gravitate more toward the moral absolutes of Christianity, whereas women tend more towards the emphasis on God's mercy and forgiveness. In practice, this means Christian men will often loudly and proudly announce their virginity and willingness to wait for marriage, where Christian women hook up with Harley McBadBoy, sometimes engaging in anal sex to preserve their technical virginity. The slutty Christian school girl and the hopelessly awkward Christian man are tropes because they contain basis in fact.

Given the way things are, I think many serious Christian men are reconciled to the possibility that they will never marry. There are worse things that could happen. I was talking about this with a nice married Catholic lady friend of mine. She said, "Maybe you scare them."

"Who, me?" I asked. "Ohh, I'm not such a bad guy... once you get to know me."

"Well, you don't talk much in person. Or smile much. And you look like Heisenberg."

"I haven't started selling meth yet."

"Don't worry, they'll all be ready for marriage in a few years."

"I know. That's the problem."

Women are pathologically dishonest about what arouses them when asked. They'll list qualities they like, but seldom what they find arousing. Simply being a good Catholic man who goes to Mass every Sunday and Holy Day isn't going to cut it anymore. Attraction cannot be negotiated. One would think my religious extremism would be a roadblock when chatting up Godless heathen girls, but many of them later admitted they rather liked my not giving a fraction of a damn whether they liked it or not. Protestant girls are always astounded when I don't back down when challenged about Catholicism.

Donal is correct that divine grace is the only way we can transcend our base nature. I don't care at all for the "Enjoy the decline" types or MGTOW. Everything we need to tame the excesses of men and women has been there all along. That's why I write and post book reviews: to encourage men to go back to the sources of what made civilization work. "Seek ye first the Kingdom of Heaven, and everything else will be given to you besides. Seek ye first the Kingdom of the World, and you'll gain neither the world nor heaven." In the short term - probably the rest of my lifetime - things are going to get worse. They'll inevitably return to what's right. The Good, the True, and the Beautiful can be suppressed for a time but it's human nature to seek them out.

3 comments:

  1. Given the way things are, I think many serious Christian men are reconciled to the possibility that they will never marry. There are worse things that could happen. I was talking about this with a nice married Catholic lady friend of mine. She said, "Maybe you scare them."

    "Who, me?" I asked. "Ohh, I'm not such a bad guy... once you get to know me."

    "Well, you don't talk much in person. Or smile much. And you look like Heisenberg."

    "I haven't started selling meth yet."

    "Don't worry, they'll all be ready for marriage in a few years."

    "I know. That's the problem."


    Could have said this myself. Although I don't look like Heisenberg- don't really look like anyone famous, for better or for worse.

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    1. My hair began severely thinning in my late 20s, so a few years ago I took the plunge and just started shaving my head. With the goatee, people say I remind them of Heisenberg. Without it, of Lex Luthor. Either way, I'm kind of pleased I apparently come across as a super villain in person.

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  2. Do you wear a snappy hat? That would really sell the image. I mean, if you are already that far along, might as well go all the way.

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